The Tale of McCluskey The Elderly Ninja And The Brickhouse Alert

Mr. McCluskey is a senior ninja. He was one of the best ninja in his heyday, had gone numerous dangerous missions almost all of which were executed to perfection. He had never failed a single mission nor ever lost his comrades during any of which. He was feared by friends and foes alike for his cunning techniques and unparalleled wits. But the once powerful and fearsome ninja McCluskey has now become the old ninja McCluskey. Even he couldn't escape the effect of time. And the closest thing to ninja world McCluskey can do now was to dress like one. To his regret, he no longer can fight or throw a shuriken to a lame duck without aching his joints.

His sons (all are powerful ninjas) fear about Mr. McCluskey's safety, being old and all. They fear that enemies could easily hurt Mr. McCluskey. But most of the time, what they want is to save him from himself. "How if he incidentally fall in the bathroom or hurt his old bones while he insistently, being stubborn and all, practiced the ninjutsu?" Because of his stubborn nature, McCluskey always refuses to live in a nursing home, nor he likes to be accompanied in his little house on the prairie. The only friend he has in his house is years-old dog named Rashomon.

McCluskey's sons' fear isn't without solid ground. Even now, bounties on McCluskey's head are still in effects in the enemy's countries, dead or alive. So, after having discussion on this matter, the sons decide to use the service of Medical Alert, a monitoring device for elderly ninja like Mr.McCluskey. This device will allow them to know before hand when danger is near, or simply when Mr. McCluskey accidentally stumble during his mock fight against Rashomon (one of his favorite past times) because the device has the fall detection that detects whenever the user is falling and instantly send signal to those in the receiving end.

With a heavy heart, because he hates the idea that someone, albeit one of his sons, is monitoring him, Mr. McCluskey agrees to use such device, knowing that it is the only thing that will stop his sons from bugging him over his safety.

In one moonless night, his sons' well-anticipated fear came to reality. A band of ninjas had been sent by McCluskey's sworn enemy to finish him off. Only a selected few know what really happened that night. A discreet report said that not long after McCluskey had finished his evening tea, three ninjas crept their way to his old house, nearly killed Rashomon if only the latter was not well-trained in ninja's art by the master himself. Rashomon, despite his old age, howled in his rage, alerting McCluskey who already in the bedroom, before assaulting one of the three ninjas with great agility.

In a quick fight that ensued, McCluskey and Rashomon were able to neutralize the initial attack. The three recon ninjas were rendered unconscious by McCluskey's powerful jutsu. But outside, there were still two...three...six...ninjas, Mr.McCluskey counted, and he was worried whether he could survive them all. His bones were aching and Rashomon had been hurt. "I might not survive the night," he said to no one. "Alas, this is a good way to die..."

And then he jumped off the window to attack his attackers instead of waiting for them. "Katsu!" he yelled. In his eagerness, more to his old age, he had trampled on his own foot, fallen to the ground just as 6 shurikens launched at him. The shurikens only hit the tatamis while, cursing, Mr McCluskey tried to roll his way up. The moment he fell down, the signal went off, alerting his eldest who in response summon himself to the scene. His brothers were close behind him. It is too vulgar to mention the slaughters that ensued here. Long story short, all the attackers were defeated. Only the initial three could manage to escape. To his sons' relieve, the decision to use Medical Alert had been a good decision after all. Only McCluskey felt indifferent. Grumbling, he babbled about how that otherwise useful device has denied him "a great way to die."